The Real World

Some thoughts on addiction, quitting drinking, and living IN IT.

I wonder who I might have become if I’d had an anchor as a child. Something to hold me in place so I could focus on school, play and, well…just being a kid. So I get an anchor tattoo hoping it might keep me grounded. Still, I float above Hollywood with the smog. 

I read a self help book called the Power of Intention. It clicks. I get it! I intend and intend and intend to be good as I trudge happy-go-lucky along the road to hell. 

When all that intending doesn’t do enough, I have an epiphany…

“I’m a sex and love addict, duh!”

I shout this admission from the rooftops. Acknowledging the problem is step one! I go to an SLAA meeting, secretly hoping to meet someone fuck-able there. Thinking maybe they can save me. No such luck. 

Still, at least i’ve figured out my problem. I continue to drown.

So, I search far and wide, lifting every rock to peek underneath. Lodged in the dust and beetle carcasses I unearth all kinds of answers as to what ails me. So many things!

But all that searching and fix…