The Funnest Girl You Ever Dated

Rockstars, self betrayal, shrooms and baths.

22 years old and very fun.

I heard what you said about me behind my back. You said I was the funnest girl you ever dated. At the time I took it as a compliment. I relished in it. THEEE FUNNEST, a bold superlative and fuck if it doesn’t fit. I take my fun very seriously. My utmost goal in everything I do in life is to have fun. Even alone with myself I’m having fun. I am the definition of fun: what provides amusement or enjoyment.

But as the years passed, when I thought about that statement it took on a darker tone. It’s not that I pined for you, or missed you, or wished you’d married me, but maybe I wanted you to want to marry me. The fun girl is never the one you settle down with, is she? The good time girl isn’t taken seriously. She’s the cool girl plus a crazy libido, plus an excess of drugs. I only showed you a sliver of myself. Being fun is probably the least interesting thing about me.

Wanna know what I said about you behind your back? I said it’s a pity when the most interesting …